It Starts With You
Hello everyone! Hope you’re all keeping safe and well, and thanks for stopping by! In this blog, I wanted to take a moment to explore the subject of success (and the places it can take us if we let it). But how to be master of your own success if you’re not even sure what that looks like? ‘It starts with you’ may sound obvious, but you’d be surprised at how many of us fail to nurture that all-important relationship with ourselves – before we even get going.
Becoming a Master of Your Own Success only comes with your willingness to fail.
Can we talk about failure for a second? Yes, it’s uncomfortable and yes, it can feel demoralizing – especially when we choose to dwell on past experiences or let them define us. But to fail is to truly be human! How to be master of your own success is instead about embracing failure as part of the sacred learning process – with each lesson moving us one step closer to our goal. Only from a place of honesty can we truly face our shortfalls head on – and seek to overcome them.
It was in fact my own shortcomings in the form of crippling social anxiety that drove me to the realization of my Beyond Intention Paradigm. I wasn’t diagnosed with Asperger’s until 27 years of age, and it still affects me to this day. So much so that at least twice a year I suffer from week-long bouts of insomnia! Luckily for me, the therapist I was referred to specialized in dealing with adults on the autistic spectrum through CBT. Without them – I wouldn’t be where I am today.
Once upon a time I was an arrogant toerag!
You wouldn’t think it, right (?!) But as part of my defence mechanism, I wasn’t the easiest human being to get along with. This partly came from my inability to form friendships, and without knowing the reason why. I had no social skills whatsoever, and so naturally felt uncomfortable with anyone around. At the time, that was the cost of doing business – but when I analyzed the subject of ‘relating’ and the relationships with our purpose, health, money and so on – I found this disconnect was also impacting other areas. It was through learning to love myself (and the people helping me) – as well as learning to accept my gift – that I finally felt able to take this journey. And that’s why it starts with you.
I’d been eating humble pie for a while
By the age of 24, I’d made and lost two multi-million-pound fortunes (!) It was only after my second catastrophe that I started to question my methods, and thus Beyond Intention was born. Before that, I had followed Vision, Purpose, Faith, Gratitude – a model which had materialized from my visualization studies – guided by the works of Maxwell Maltz, Wallace D. Wattles, Charles F. Haanel and one of my early mentors Stuart Goldsmith.
By following this model, I started out by constructing my vision within my mind and being faithful to that. Acting with purpose through the development of certainty, and being grateful every day for everything that showed up. But something had me stumped; after losing my fortune a second time round, it clearly wasn’t working!
Had my ‘gap year’ lasted a long 18 years?
It was upon this realization that doubt began to cloud my mind. Was I delusional? Had my whole life up until this point been a lie? I’d lost my place at Oxford University and vowed instead to take the unorthodox route. But should I have finished my degree, got a job, and just listened to my mum?! It was on that journey that I was able to embark on a new path – directing that power to becoming a better version of myself.
Finally in 2016, I attended one of my first events with a man who is now one of my teachers – Dr Joe Dispenza – and it was during that event that the pieces began to slot together. I was sitting in a room with a guy that had done the ‘lab tests’ and understood the science behind what I had taken from studies, and it started to make sense. I realized in that moment that gratitude does in fact work beforehand, and that it has the power to rewire the brain – and rewrite your future.
The choice is quite literally yours!
How to be master of your own success from a place that’s truly real? In my book Stepping Beyond Intention – where I introduce my Beyond Intention Paradigm more formally – I speak about the choice that underpins our reality. Whether consciously or unconsciously, it’s been scientifically proven that reality is made up of energy that responds to expectation. That expectation is a choice that is made at an unconscious level. In that regard you could say this is on auto-loop – a repeat request – as our brains tend to operate on programs.
When we set an intention, we’re deliberately disrupting that automatic program by consciously interjecting with our new form of instruction. This is easier said than done of course. Beyond Intention allows us to break free of the things holding us back from making those choices.
Why the ‘power of now’ is so effective in becoming a Master of Your Own Success
It’s all baby steps, but the first official step of my Beyond Intention Paradigm is about wielding a mindset of empowerment, and owning the gift that you have to create through the choices that you make. Having accepted that power, the act of exercising it can only happen within a place that’s real. The second we move on from a moment, it becomes the past (and the future hasn’t happened yet) – so all we really have is now. Beyond Intention is about how to practically execute being in the now; if we’re not there, we’re somewhere else. As human beings, we’re conditioned to brush over the now! So, the next step is about coming back to that state, and letting go of the blame, guilt and shame you may associate with your past.
Learning to put gratitude first to be a Master of Your Own Success
Step three of Beyond Intention is about executing the point of creation. By generating that expectation – and accepting it as a present reality – we can be grateful for it in the now. The transferral of gratitude to that pre-emptive point remains a game changer for me; if I can be grateful for something now, I can demonstrate the highest point of certainty. I can start to connect with that outcome physically and mentally, and that is when it happens on command. Circling back, how to be master of your own success is moving from the act of believing to the act of knowing.
The final step? To put it plainly, it’s about listening! It’s about thinking and feeling with awareness and keeping our eye on the prize; it’s about constantly checking in and erasing the doubt that threatens to veer us off course. It starts with you, and it ends with you too – in place where you’re no longer required to set that intention because you’re living that experience; you’ve moved beyond intention!
If you want to learn more about my Beyond Intention Paradigm, you’ll find everything you need in my book Stepping Beyond Intention. How to be master of your own success comes in its many forms, so exploring my other books, blog and podcast can help you make that life-changing first step! Why not download my free Intention Setting Cheat Sheet to get you started? Until next time, dream with your eyes open!
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